Jeri Wine: Out and Proud

had been a teacher in Northern Ontario for over a decade, living with partner of many years, to friends we knew were lesbians, and to nobody else. The very idea of being was terrifying and the thought of my secret becoming known, and therefore outside of domain of control through re-telling, was nightmarish. Nothing had changed in attitude when went south to Toronto. still found it very difficult to talk about sexuality with anyone without first checking that they themselves were lesbian or gay, or that they had guessed and were fine with it. This is the background for the time met Jeri Wine. had left for Toronto to work on PhD at the Ontario Institute for Studies in Education and, although area was Sociology, quickly heard of Jeri who was in Psychology. She's a lesbian! went the rumour and was so entranced with the idea that she would be both and proud to be a lesbian. For me, sexuality was a source of pleasure and pain, passion and anguish, and for the life of me, could never reconcile these polar opposite emotions. used to ask myself if wanted to wake up heterosexual, normal, be with a man and live like everyone else, but the answer was always that pleasure in loving women far outweighed any other social discomfort or unease. was two years into the doctoral program in Sociology of Education when made the decision that was going to write dissertation about lesbian teachers. The topic scared me not only because there was so little written about it at the time but because if anyone asked what was writing about either had to myself or lie about the topic. chose supervisor and the day came when had to choose the rest of committee. It was then that knew that Jeri Wine had to be part of this project. There was no email at the time (1982) which meant that had to call and make an appointment. called and was given a time to meet. arrived full of trepidation: had to ask this stranger to be on committee, but worse, was going to be confronted with someone who was not afraid of being a lesbian and would have to tell her that was, and was not out. That morning got to her office right on time and knocked. She opened the door with a smile of welcome and could not find voice to reply to her greetings. sat down and finally was able to tell her about dissertation topic and would she agree to sit on committee. She looked at me and said: I would love to be part of this work. No sooner had she agreed than the rigorous professor that she was took over: what methodology was using, how was going to find participants, how was going to protect these women, and so on. answered all her questions. And then she asked me whether had ever interviewed anyone. No, had not, told her. She then took me aback by very generously offering to teach me. She asked me to meet with her two or three times and that would bring questions and she would pretend she was a respondent. was thrilled. But there was work to do first: had to produce an interview protocol and think seriously about the methodology. The latter was easy since supervisor was Dorothy Smith and had chosen her because was very interested in doing an institutional ethnography. The questions were more difficult. Here was, unable to come out, finding it difficult to talk about sexuality, and yet having to think of ways to make interviewees comfortable enough to talk to me. Of course, took for granted that everyone had the same problem with as had and, thankfully for project, women were more than ready to discuss how they managed their sexuality in their professional lives once had recruited them. My first meeting with Jeri turned to be fun. My greatest pleasure at the time was hearing coming out stories: how did women know that they loved women? At what age did this revelation happen? How did they feel when they knew? …

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